Sunday, March 16, 2014

Trash talk.

WARNING: Emo post ahead.

I keep...

...because they were the best days of my life.

Don't ask me to throw away things that brings back good memories. They may be what revives me when all hell breaks loose. Unfortunately, hell has been any time of the day when I remember that I'm here today in the situation I am in, where there isn't anything that makes of a good memory.

I deserve to have those good memories because I earned them.

Don't get me wrong. I'm trying to make every breathing moment memorable in the best way. But if I'm treated like trash, this trash would like to be reminded of its once-great life despite being, what, trash?

Sunday, March 09, 2014

Happy 26th.

Happy 26th birthday to the guy whose life had brought joy during my days of youth. Even though he's not around anymore, memories of him are still alive, and for that, happy birthday, Dom! :)

Friday, February 14, 2014

Happy Valentine's day.

Happy Valentine's day, you...

...the one who's freed from all pain and fear.

Sunday, January 05, 2014


How would you place yourself in society?

Someone who's there, or someone who isn't?

It's pretty much the case that everyone's of the latter case, because realistically speaking, no one fits into a perfect jigsaw puzzle in this world. Everyone's trying hard to be accepted into a certain class, wearing a different mask with different people. That's what adapting is about afterall. Problem is, how much adapting have we done that we've lost our true identity?

I've been through all that, experimenting with masks. Some I can't even afford to but do, and some just evidently ill-fitting. If I try too hard, I'm a 'Try Hard'. If I wear it well but simply can't cope, well, who's there to turn to since I'm pretending so hard? In the end, it's tiring to be a slave to others who are simply slaves to others.

It's with these experiences that I feel thankful for the friends I have, who does not care where I'm at right now. We may not be peas in a pod, but we accept our differences and look past shits and all.

For that, cheers!

Sunday, December 08, 2013

I'm strange, thank you.

Shit happens in life.

But the only person who can make your own being happy is yourself.

Can't get yourself out of a situation? Make the best out of it.

Some people may say I'm in denial, but really, I'm just living (leaching) the best out of it.

And to be honest, I'm really enjoying life right now...

...A life where, strangely, I've learned to love.

So to my dear friends, don't worry too much about me. My story may seem sad, and some would say unusual... But I can't live based on what others think about me. I am me. And I am, somewhat, happy.

And yes, I have a kid. I need to think about her. Society might taunt her. You need not remind me. I know. But if I worry, she will worry. I'm guiding her to see past criticism. I'm guiding her to be strong, to hold her head up high and see the rainbow beyond the dark clouds. I know I can't predict the future - to know if she will turn out the way I hope her to be. But if even my closest cannot show the support a friend can give... I don't know if she, the innocent one, will truly believe in support outside home, regardless of what shitty situation she falls into in the future. The support called "friend". The "friend" who is a fraction of society.

So please don't judge me, my friend. And for those who doesn't, thank you.